no one reads these blogs anyways..

the words cant come out,
they never come out right.
the things I want to say,
the things I need to tell you,
I can't let you know.
you can't know.
I need you to know.
but you cant.

would you even understand,
if I began to even try to tell you?
would you understand?
would you listen?
would you hear what I am trying to say?
would you judge me?
or would you understand why?
can you even begin to understand why?
why this is happening.
why is this happening?
I don't even know,
I can't even understand.
so how could you?

I need so desperately to tell you.
I need so desperately for you to understand.
but you cant.
you cant.